Arrrghhh, doesn’t it make your blood boil when you find certain items missing from their designated spot? Or your shampoo bottle half-empty, or having to do someone else’s dishes? No, you’re not overreacting over roommate issues – it’s totally normal to sometimes feel annoyed with your roomi. It isn’t easy to live with someone. But it is easier to try making someone understand what’s getting on your nerves than to pick a fight!
Here’s how to renegotiate your terms with your annoying roommate instead of pulling your hair out in frustration.
They eat your food without permission
So, you’ve been dreaming about that croissant that you left in the fridge before leaving for work. But you come home to find it missing! Turns out your roommate ate it because they were hungry.
What to do: Get some food first, it’s never a good idea to confront when you’re hangry; it just leads to more roommate conflict. Try to have a relaxed conversation later. Tell them that they need to check with you before eating your food so you can plan and get something else ready for a snack/dinner so y’all can avoid a silly roommate issue.
Annoying roommate’s messiness has reached your living area
You are meticulous and organized while your roomi is a moving mess. It’s fine if it’s in the confines of their room. But they leave their stuff in every room they go. Gosh, someone could even tell what they did the whole day by just tracking their trail of mess!
What to do: First, try to bring this roommate issue up in the least confrontational way possible. Try to tell them you’re uncomfortable working in the living area because their mess takes up space and is distracting. If talking it out fails, try giving them a taste of their own medicine; leave dirty dishes in the sink or your stuff on their bed. When they confront you, tell them why you did that and how it affects you when they do the same.
Their passive-aggression leads to roommate issues
Your roommate is awfully silent and doesn’t participate in fun stuff/conversations like they used to. You can often see their eyes roll back into their head each time you’re around.
What to do: Never treat passive-aggressiveness with more passive-aggressiveness. Strike a casual conversation. Walk into the room nonchalantly and ask them – “Hey I noticed that you’re not talking properly to me, did I do something to upset you?” or “Hey I noticed you’ve been putting my stuff on the shelf – I’ll be more mindful of that if that’s bothering you.”
If they don’t want to talk about it (the annoying roommate that they are!) that’s totally their wish. But your bringing it up will help clear the air a little.
They are smoking or drinking all the freakin’ time
You don’t mind them smoking or drinking. But when they know your paper is due tomorrow and they’re planning a party tonight, they’ve crossed a line.
What to do: Tell your roommate that you need to work or study, and you don’t want this to become a roommate conflict. Tell them their lifestyle is affecting not just them but you too. Council them, and let them know you’re there to talk things through if they’re going through a difficult time.
They are self-centered and inconsiderate
They will do what they want to do; they’ll watch loud TV, eat your food, refuse to split the money equally, and continue to deplete your toiletries. You’ve tried to talk, asked for help, and asked them to be supportive. You’ve even decided to give them a taste of their own medicine. Yet, they fall back to their old ways.
What to do: This is the most annoying roommate quality. It’s best to tell them that you two are not meant to be roomis. And that they should find a new compatible roommate. You can’t go out of your way to be accommodating. It’s better than being frustrated and annoyed all the time.
Breathe. This is a temporary situation – you will get through this.
Set some rules to avoid serious roommate issues, and seek help if the situation goes beyond control.
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